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/d/CafeDread

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My wife's drunken short

by /u/Thehighlow · 2 votes · 1 week ago

This is a continuance of /post/6ebd3060b31ed76f8c88/#c-93da136fd1c46bf25d

Before you can make a decision, your junkie grabs you by the arm, and pulls you behind one of the parked cars to your left.

"I knew I brought them for a reason." You think.

The two of you quickly decide to stay on the sidewalk, proceeding toward the hobos with caution. As you stop just ahead of them, the smell of overcooked hotdogs and body odor wafts into your nasal cavities. You hear your junkie's stomach growl. It growls so loudly that the hobos stop arguing, fixing their eyes on you. They are both wearing tattered jeans and boots. One of them has a well worn Carhartt brand coat on, and a stocking cap. The other one is wearing what appears to be several sweatshirts under a rain jacket, fingerless gloves, and earmuffs.

Before you can say anything, one of them starts shouting at you. It appears as though he cannot control the volume at which he speaks.

"Hey man, do you got a light?!" he practically screams at you.

"Quiet down you old fuck!" the other one retorts.

You glance back and forth between the old man and the fire, in disbelief at the question. A slow, mischievous grin spreads across his face.

"That fire is a little bigger than what I'm looking for." he says, as he pulls out a blackened bubble.

You suddenly start searching all your pockets. You know you had a lighter on the way to the liquor store, but as you go through your last pocket all you find is a hole.

"Sorry, I must have lost it traveling." you mumble. He continues staring at you, almost through you. Then he says, "Hey, man you got a light?" in the exact same tone as before, but quieter this time.

You shake your head at him, quickly realizing this is going nowhere. As you all stand in silence for a second, you start sizing up the pair with your eyes. You contemplate robbing them for their food and drugs. You can hear the quiet squeaking of your partner, gritting their teeth at the sight of the pipe. Your eyes dart over to the other hobo, his eyes glaring daringly at you. "Hey what's in the bag?" he asks, pointing to what's left of the alcohol you purchased at the liquor store.

Do you?:

A:) Say nothing. Attempt to rob the hobos.

B:) Say nothing. Decide to leave peacefully, hurrying home as night approaches.

C:) Be honest, then try to barter the alcohol for the meth.

EDIT: No hobos were harmed during the writing of this FICTIONAL story, jesus christ lol

Comments (7)
/u/Phobos36 · 2 votes · 1 week ago · Link

D:) Pull down my pants, start doing the helicopter with my dick, turn 360 degrees and crabwalk towards them to start an epic LARP turn based battle. Then loot them because of course i'm going to win cause i have cheat codes on.

/u/Thehighlow OP · 1 votes · 1 week ago · Link

That is, by far, the best answer so far!

/u/niplips43 · 2 votes · 1 week ago · Link

B! B! B!

/u/Cipherline · 1 votes · 1 week ago · Link

C. I think you should just be honest

/u/daznboyz · 1 votes · 1 week ago · Link

c. be honest because to be honest you must use the middleman truth ....

HES GOT THE BEEEEEST SHIT IN TOOOOWN!!!!!!

truths cel number : 9054981212

/u/nugget · 0 votes · 1 week ago · Link

Hmmm, I"ve read some shit posts but this one iis in my top 10.

,

Why the fuck would you bash a hobo for no reasom? I dont get it, idoess tit prove your a hard na in the US? kow

Grow some balls, go back to school and and pay attention

If you need to bash hobo;s for a living how the fuck are you getting onto Torr?

Rant over, be smart

/u/Thehighlow OP · 1 votes · 1 week ago · Link

It's called a short STORY, stupid. We don't need to barter alcohol for meth. lmao did you not read the first part? shit post my ass (so to speak) click the link at the beginning of this post. she hopes for people to decide what direction they want the story to go in and she writes off of the feedback.